Igore

"i want all of you forever. you and me. every day."

ideal

i made up this image of you in my head.
i made up the color of your hair, and your eyes.
i even made up the house we owned,
the kids we had.
the jokes we told and the times we shared.
wrapping your christmas present,
kissing your neck, framing our picture.

you are sweet, and everyone adores you.
you are mine.
we can listen to music all day together.
we go to the beach pretty regularly
and sometimes you make me breakfast.
sometimes.
we go on runs with our dog
and on the weekends we go to the game.
i can tell you anything and you always listen.
you never hurt me and never lie.

you buy me flowers on my birthday.
sometimes we go on car rides just to get away.
you always want to be near me.
you love me.
you cherish me.

& i am letting you go.
you do not really exist.

you will lie to me, and you will hurt me.
you will get to me deeper than anyone has.
you might forget your loyalty to me,
you might even leave me.
not everyone will like you,
and some days you won't like me.

you will do all these things because i made you up.
you're not real.
you were just an image in my head.

raw

background noise
fuzzy thoughts
my heart goes thump

bottom of my shoes
no you
back turned and my stomach
too.

that just happened
and i already
failed to remembered
im drawing a blank
my heart is blank

you wiped my heart clean

clean
brand new
fresh
ripe

a wish to not come true.

to be up on a cloud
where i can be loud

where i could cry if i wanted
or just fly.

to be up on a cloud in your arms again.

what i would give right now
to be up there,
to be next to you.
ask me, i would do.

i'm mad at you for leaving me there
but i can see why you had to go
its crazy here.

i just wish you took me too.
i have no one to talk with, like how i used to with you.

i thought i did, but he's gone too.

"oh no, here comes that sun again.
that means another day without you my friend.
and it hurts me to look into the mirror at myself.
and it hurts even more..." -BH

sunday afternoon

there's only one you...
strongest love i ever felt...
nothing more real...

...in the world.

awwww, stress.

rash on the hands,
jokes are swirling
doctor takes a gander
looks as though he pities me
i wonder the cause
dyshidrosis eczema
directly related to high stress


money? no
school? no
soccer? ...maybe
then what?!


"oh, it is love."

nice to know you, goodbye.

amazing?
i think so.

high school, bye school

summer, church,
hi its nice to meet you
this girls beautiful i dono what to do
hi its nice to meet you too

school, lunch,
you know its been on my mind
damn hes so fine
we should take it further
its about time

every day, for 6 months,
baby you know i love you
man i really do
baby you know i love you too

school, graduation
im leaving.
its over with me and you.
its been the only thing on my mind.
but baby-- i thought-- man its fine
maybe itll work out another time.

summer, phone rings,
hey its me sorry i havent called
how are you
now what am i supposed to do?
i miss you
yeah yeah i miss you too

every day, since,
i dont know,
i just cant get him out of my head
everything will be fine
yeah i know my mom says itll just take time

knock, at my door,
hey we gotta talk
i cant get over you
im still in love
do you love me?
i hope you do

no,
you broke my heart in two.
i cant-- i dont love you.

dusk

windows down
music loud
absolutely no one around.
windy roads
with no stops.
destination?
have plans
but nothing will rush me